Four Certain Things

On Twitter yesterday, someone posted a couple of lines from Rudyard Kipling's "The Gods of the Copybook Headings." If you are unfamiliar with this particular poem of Mr. Kipling's, it's not as well known as The Jungle Book or "Gunga Din," then I commend it to you.

It should be noted that copybooks had words of wisdom printed at the top and students would fill the page below by writing the proverb repeatedly. The primary aim was to practice writing but secondarily to ingrain the wisdom into the students' minds. Kipling includes a few of these in the poem (look for "And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said") as examples of the wisdom.

In the poem, this wisdom is contrasted with that from the Gods of the Market Place. If you've ever read  Neil Gaiman's American Gods you might wonder, as I do, if Mr. Gaiman was influenced by this poem. There too old gods are pitted against new (American) gods. Gaiman, while similar to Kipling seems to favor the old gods, does not seem as sure that the old gods will triumph.

Kipling's words are worth pondering for a bit. If he was noticing these things in his time, how much more have we succumbed to The Gods of the Market Place today. Much of the strife I see generally and online in particular could be resolved by paying a little more attention to The Gods of the Copybook Headings.

The Gods of the Copybook Headings by Rudyard Kipling 

AS I PASS through my incarnations in every age and race,
I make my proper prostrations to the Gods of the Market Place.
Peering through reverent fingers I watch them flourish and fall,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings, I notice, outlast them all 

We were living in trees when they met us. They showed us each in turn
That Water would certainly wet us, as Fire would certainly burn:
But we found them lacking in Uplift, Vision and Breadth of Mind,
So we left them to teach the Gorillas while we followed the March of Mankind. 

We moved as the Spirit listed. They never altered their pace,
Being neither cloud nor wind-borne like the Gods of the Market Place,
But they always caught up with our progress, and presently word would come
That a tribe had been wiped off its icefield, or the lights had gone out in Rome. 

With the Hopes that our World is built on they were utterly out of touch,
They denied that the Moon was Stilton; they denied she was even Dutch;
They denied that Wishes were Horses; they denied that a Pig had Wings;
So we worshipped the Gods of the Market Who promised these beautiful things. 

When the Cambrian measures were forming, They promised perpetual peace.
They swore, if we gave them our weapons, that the wars of the tribes would cease.
But when we disarmed They sold us and delivered us bound to our foe,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "Stick to the Devil you know." 

On the first Feminian Sandstones we were promised the Fuller Life
(Which started by loving our neighbour and ended by loving his wife)
Till our women had no more children and the men lost reason and faith,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "The Wages of Sin is Death." 

In the Carboniferous Epoch we were promised abundance for all,
By robbing selected Peter to pay for collective Paul;
But, though we had plenty of money, there was nothing our money could buy,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "If you don't work you die." 

Then the Gods of the Market tumbled, and their smooth-tongued wizards withdrew
And the hearts of the meanest were humbled and began to believe it was true
That All is not Gold that Glitters, and Two and Two make Four
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings limped up to explain it once more. 

As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began.
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire; 

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!